Bruce Almighty

On Sun, 08 Jul 2007 22:37:35 -0700, Tim Bruening
wrote:

>In this movie, God goes on vacation and gives his powers to Bruce.
>Bruce can do anything he wants as long as he tells no one of his Godhood
>and doesn't interfere with peoples' free will.
>
>If I had such powers, I would eliminate all nuclear weapons, end world
>hunger and poverty, and cure AIDS.

You kind of missed the whole 'not interfering with people's free will'
limitation with that.

--
I have a theory, it could be bunnies
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William George Ferguson wrote:

> On Sun, 08 Jul 2007 22:37:35 -0700, Tim Bruening
> wrote:
>
> >In this movie, God goes on vacation and gives his powers to Bruce.
> >Bruce can do anything he wants as long as he tells no one of his Godhood
> >and doesn't interfere with peoples' free will.
> >
> >If I had such powers, I would eliminate all nuclear weapons, end world
> >hunger and poverty, and cure AIDS.
>
> You kind of missed the whole 'not interfering with people's free will'
> limitation with that.

In my mind, "Interfering with free will" would constitute controlling
peoples' minds (like bending Bush's mind to make him withdraw from Iraq) or
controlling their emotions (like what Bruce tried to do to his then
ex-girlfriend), or perhaps erecting a force field to physically restrain
people. Physically making nuclear weapons disappear would not do either. No
person would suffer mind control, emotional control, or imprisonment.
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William George Ferguson wrote:

> On Sun, 08 Jul 2007 22:37:35 -0700, Tim Bruening
> wrote:
>
> >In this movie, God goes on vacation and gives his powers to Bruce.
> >Bruce can do anything he wants as long as he tells no one of his Godhood
> >and doesn't interfere with peoples' free will.
> >
> >If I had such powers, I would eliminate all nuclear weapons, end world
> >hunger and poverty, and cure AIDS.
>
> You kind of missed the whole 'not interfering with people's free will'
> limitation with that.

I'm certain that curing AIDS wouldn't violate the ban on infringing free
will! HIVs are not sentient.
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William George Ferguson wrote:

> On Sun, 08 Jul 2007 22:37:35 -0700, Tim Bruening
> wrote:
>
> >In this movie, God goes on vacation and gives his powers to Bruce.
> >Bruce can do anything he wants as long as he tells no one of his Godhood
> >and doesn't interfere with peoples' free will.
> >
> >If I had such powers, I would eliminate all nuclear weapons, end world
> >hunger and poverty, and cure AIDS.
>
> You kind of missed the whole 'not interfering with people's free will'
> limitation with that.

Would I be permitted to appear before Bush in the image of Jesus Christ and
urge him to exit Iraq?
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Anim8rFSK wrote:

> Stan Brown wrote:
>
> > Sun, 08 Jul 2007 22:37:35 -0700 from Tim Bruening
> > :
> > > In this movie, God goes on vacation and gives his powers to Bruce.
> > > Bruce can do anything he wants as long as he tells no one of his Godhood
> > > and doesn't interfere with peoples' free will.
> > >
> > > If I had such powers, I would eliminate all nuclear weapons, end world
> > > hunger and poverty, and cure AIDS.
> >
> > Why not content yourself with a more modest goal, namely eliminating
> > off-topic articles in rec.arts.tv?
>
> Notice he's also morphing IDs to evade killfiles.

Tim has always alternated between the two names. Besides both of them
have the phrase "Tim Bruening" so it's an easy morph to keep up with.
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In article ,
Mark Nobles wrote:

> Anim8rFSK wrote:
>
> > Stan Brown wrote:
> >
> > > Sun, 08 Jul 2007 22:37:35 -0700 from Tim Bruening
> > > :
> > > > In this movie, God goes on vacation and gives his powers to Bruce.
> > > > Bruce can do anything he wants as long as he tells no one of his Godhood
> > > > and doesn't interfere with peoples' free will.
> > > >
> > > > If I had such powers, I would eliminate all nuclear weapons, end world
> > > > hunger and poverty, and cure AIDS.
> > >
> > > Why not content yourself with a more modest goal, namely eliminating
> > > off-topic articles in rec.arts.tv?
> >
> > Notice he's also morphing IDs to evade killfiles.
>
> Tim has always alternated between the two names. Besides both of them
> have the phrase "Tim Bruening" so it's an easy morph to keep up with.

k, thanks. I finally gave up on the sheer volume, and the next day
there he was again.

--
"No man ever notices a woman's shoes, unless they have boobs on them."
-- Mark Nobles
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Joe Gillis wrote:

> >>I would eliminate all nuclear weapons, >>end world
> > > hunger and poverty, and cure AIDS.
> >
> > But what about the people who are working on the cure for AIDS?
>
> What about poor, hungry people who are working on nuclear weapons that
> would cure AIDS???
>
And besides that, how could we nuke the whales and the baby seals when
they turn against us?
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Once Upon A Time Magnus, Robot Fighter wrote:

>On Mon, 09 Jul 2007 18:24:04 GMT, Captain Infinity
> wrote:
>
>>Once Upon A Time Tim Bruening wrote:
>>
>>>In this movie, God goes on vacation and gives his powers to Bruce.
>>>Bruce can do anything he wants as long as he tells no one of his Godhood
>>>and doesn't interfere with peoples' free will.
>>>
>>>If I had such powers, I would eliminate all nuclear weapons,
>>
>>Forcing most of the world to live in fear of invading hordes from other
>>countries.
>
>There are about three countrys that qualify for that statement. And
>those three would stock up on nerve gases and bio weapons tout sweet

That's 3 too many for me. NUKE 'EM BEFORE THEY REACH THE CHILDREN!

>>>end world hunger and poverty,
>>
>>Causing a massive surge in human population, making the world unlivable.
>
>This isn't Star Trek

Not yet it ain't. But we're getting there. More and more people are
being born every day, and most are living longer than nature intended.
We need to start killing people at a much faster rate. We should start
with those that are happily living on Death Row, eating up our tax money
day after day with their fried chicken and baked beans room-service
dinners and free room and board.

>>>and cure AIDS.
>>
>>Great. Then what are we going to feed to the Kanimits from "To Serve
>>Man" to poison them? We'll ALL get eaten then! What are you, insane?

Damn, that makes a lot of sense! Please sign me up for your newsletter.


**
Captain Infinity
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Once Upon A Time Tim Bruening wrote:

>
>
>Captain Infinity wrote:
>
>> Once Upon A Time Tim Bruening wrote:
>>
>> >In this movie, God goes on vacation and gives his powers to Bruce.
>> >Bruce can do anything he wants as long as he tells no one of his Godhood
>> >and doesn't interfere with peoples' free will.
>> >
>> >If I had such powers, I would eliminate all nuclear weapons,
>>
>> Forcing most of the world to live in fear of invading hordes from other
>> countries.
>
>Nuclear weapons didn't stop North Korea from invading South Korea, or stop
>Iraq from invading Kuwait.

They may have if the chickenshit generals had the balls to use 'em.


**
Captain Infinity
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William George Ferguson wrote:

> On Sun, 08 Jul 2007 22:37:35 -0700, Tim Bruening
> wrote:
>
> >In this movie, God goes on vacation and gives his powers to Bruce.
> >Bruce can do anything he wants as long as he tells no one of his Godhood
> >and doesn't interfere with peoples' free will.
> >
> >If I had such powers, I would eliminate all nuclear weapons, end world
> >hunger and poverty, and cure AIDS.
>
> You kind of missed the whole 'not interfering with people's free will'
> limitation with that.

I'll appear in the skies, perform miracles, and command people to
eliminate nuclear weapons, cut military budgets, and use the savings to
fight poverty and hunger and disease.
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In article ,
Mark Nobles wrote:

> Joe Gillis wrote:
>
> > >>I would eliminate all nuclear weapons, >>end world
> > > > hunger and poverty, and cure AIDS.
> > >
> > > But what about the people who are working on the cure for AIDS?
> >
> > What about poor, hungry people who are working on nuclear weapons that
> > would cure AIDS???
> >
> And besides that, how could we nuke the whales and the baby seals when
> they turn against us?

And the penguins. Don't forget about the penguins. Shifty nefarious
little creatures. Never trusted them and I never will.
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BTR1701 wrote:

> In article ,
> Mark Nobles wrote:
>
> > Joe Gillis wrote:
> >
> > > >>I would eliminate all nuclear weapons, >>end world
> > > > > hunger and poverty, and cure AIDS.
> > > >
> > > > But what about the people who are working on the cure for AIDS?
> > >
> > > What about poor, hungry people who are working on nuclear weapons that
> > > would cure AIDS???
> > >
> > And besides that, how could we nuke the whales and the baby seals when
> > they turn against us?
>
> And the penguins. Don't forget about the penguins. Shifty nefarious
> little creatures. Never trusted them and I never will.

How can whales, baby seals, and penguins threaten us?
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Tim Bruening wrote:

> Mark Nobles wrote:
>
> > wrote:
> >
> > > Mark Nobles wrote:
> > > > Tim Bruening wrote:
> > > >
> > > > > In this movie, God goes on vacation and gives his powers to Bruce.
> > > > > Bruce can do anything he wants as long as he tells no one of his
> > > > > Godhood
> > > > > and doesn't interfere with peoples' free will.
> > > > >
> > > > > If I had such powers, I would eliminate all nuclear weapons, end world
> > > > > hunger and poverty, and cure AIDS.
> > > > >
> > > > I take it you didn't see the end of the movie then, when he tried to do
> > > > all those things.
> > >
> > > Was this before or after Bruce asked to not be God anymore?
> >
> > Before. It was the reason he made this request.
>
> Why did his attempt to eliminate nuclear weapons fail? After all, physically
> eliminate nukes would not violate anyone's free will.
>
I don't know. If only we knew someone who just saw this weekend so they
could tell us.
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