A Handymans Nightmare (Riffraff fiction)

Here's an updated version of a story printed in Crazed Imaginations a while
back, hope the Riffraff fan's like it...

The Transylvanians share a lot in common with humans from Earth" breath the
same air, eat the same protien, are comfortable in the same gravity, s;eep in
the same cycles, etc...seem's a fair to assume that they also dream, and thus
would also have nightmares.
Lets see what Riffraff's might dream, or have a nightmare of in...

" A HANDYMANS NIGHTMARE" by Uncle Bill :-)


It was almost sunrise in Denton. The dark blacxk sky was giving way to
shades of blue and purple. Morning would be coming over the horizon, and that
ment that everyone in the castle household would be asleep.
Well, almost everyone. Riffraff was still up, a glass of wine in his hands
as he sat on Furters throne. Frank himself was upstairs, fast asleep after a
heroine and beer binge with that disgustingly vulger biker-boy, Eddie. Columbia
would be in the arms of his sister, which left Riffraff to himself. Which was
just as well, he prefered to sleep alone.
So off he walked, down into the basement, down the cold, wet stairs that he
had dig into the bedrock himself , to the small, small room with the hole in
the floor.
Riff crawled into the coffin in the hole, closed the lid, and snuggled up to
sleep until the sun went down.
Soon he was asleep, and soon he dreamed...

He was dreaming, Riffraff knew this in that far-off, detached way that every
person knows he is dreamning when he is dreaming. He was floating, far above
the castle, over the Denton woods, and he swooped down, towards a school of all
things, Denton High...he looked into a window and saw a young man, gawky and
sjy, as he smiled at a pretty blond girl with large jubblies...he didnt know
these people, or why he was seeing them, and it didnt seem to matter because he
turned, and found himself flying upwards again, towards the castle...

Suddenly it was dark, raining, and he was in the main entrance. he heard the
sound of a scream, of breaking glass, of angry words...it was Furters voice!
Riff couldnt make out what was being said, but the voice was angry and alarmed
at the same time.
Riff drifted up the elevator shaft in that dream0like way, and came into the
lab, and saw suprised at what he saw:
the place was a shambles. The floor was a mess of chemicals and broken test
tubes, sparks flew from the triple contact electro magnet...and people were
there.
First there was Columbia, and she was sitting pressed up against the deep
freeze. She had been crying, her racoon eyes dripped mascara tears down her
face, and tears were also frozen against the door, the light glittered on the
frozen tears as Riff hovered near her.He thought he could hear the far off
sound of a motorcycle engein inside the deep freeze, and the ghostly sound of a
far-off saxophone as well...whatever that ment.
Then he turned, towards the large tanbk that was in the center of the lab.
The side was broken open, the multicolored fluids insides had drained out
all over the floor...and an arm hung out from the broken glass. It was strong
and muscular and Riff could see blond hair floating just below the surface of
the liquid that was left inside...liquid that was tinged red with what looked
and smelled like blood.
Then Riff heard crying. He knew the sound, the voice, the heavy breathing. It
was his sister. Riff turned, slowly, and then in his dream he saw Magenta
there, in the corner! She wore her uniform and wings.She was on her knees,
huddled up, a position very unlike her. She two had black tears running down
her face, and she was openly weeping. She looked directly up into Riffs eyes
and sobbed,
"How could you? I thought you like him...He...he liked you..."
"He didnt like meeeeeee," sighed Riff in his dream, and at once was suprised
to here himself speak as he had no idea what he ment! It just came out, as
things sometimes do in a dream.
Then he heard another sound. Heavy breathing, grunting almost. He turned,
and saw two people. One of them was dead.
It was Frank N Furter. he was dressed in the red cirset that he only wore for
formal occasions. His body lay prone on the floor, horribly burnt and scorcthed
from some heat source. The back of his head was bashed in, blood ran freely
away from the scientists smashed skull, and bit of brain pulp wear near the
body.
There was another person stading there, a Transylvanian, wearing a space
uniform! In his hands was a triune blaster, the weapon that had killed Frank,
no doubt.
The man in the uniform was breathing heavily, and Riff could see that hs
whole body was shaking, from drugs or adrenaline or anger, he did not know.
The man suddenly stopped breathing, stopped shaking. The man knew that
Riffraff was there, watching him. Slolwy the man in the space uniform started
to turn, and for some reason Riffraff started to feel afraid. Very afraid.
But he couldnt turn away. The man in the space uniform turned all the way and
faced him: the face was gaunt, sunken, little more than pallid skin pulled over
a skull. Greasy blond hair streamed from a near balding head. Eyes that blazed
with hate and envy speared him and the flesh around the eyes was dead, dark, as
dark as his sunken cheeks...
It was him. Riffraff was looking at himself.
"Well, now you know," said the ugly, murderer version of himself...

Riff opened his eyes, still half asleep. he opened the lid of the coffin,
and could feel that it was dark outside. Time to wake up. he knew he had had a
dream, but it was leaving his memoryt as dreams often do. But that was fine,
riff had much work to do in the next few weeks, before the annual Transylvanian
convetion. November was just a month away, after all...

END